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This weird, wonderful coffee maker costs $700

It’s happened to all of us: You drag yourself out of bed in the morning, stumble into the kitchen, reach for the coffee grounds and think, “I really like my Mr. Coffee, but I wish I had a coffee maker that costs almost a thousand bucks and looks like something Kevin Kline’s character invented in Wild Wild West.”

Fortunately for us, a little company called Iikone has developed a pour-over brewer that not only costs $700, but looks like it’s about to come to life, crawl around your house, and exterminate all sentient life.

The Iikone Coffee Brewer

Look at it sitting there. It’s just waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike.

The Iikone brewer stands about 15 inches tall and is built from medical-grade stainless steel. When it’s not threatening to murder you in your sleep, it’s allegedly one of the best pour-over options out there.

According to Iikone, the secret to the brewer’s exquisite pour is the completely unobstructed filter. Traditional pour-over brewers support the filter with some kind of material that disrupts surface tension. Without that material obstructing the filter, the Iikone brewer supposedly produces “more complex” and “less bitter” coffee.

Are you skeptical? Me too! How about this: Drop $700 on this thing, barricade yourself in your bedroom at night so this hellish beast of bean water doesn’t silence you forever, and make sure to sound off in the comments section so we know you’re alive so you can tell us how your coffee tastes!

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